*laughs* Mysterious Way Indeed.

As many of yous might already realized by now, most of my posts had something to do my feelings and all.

WHICH sounded very kasian of me, right? LOL.

Whatever shyte i've jotted were written sincerely. Just for the record.

During one of my many confused moments, i've decided to listen to Mom's advice. She convinced me that whenever i felt troubled etc and had no one to turn to, i should always spare a time or two to pray in order to seek for inner peace.

And so i did not that i never done that before though ;p

I've told Him what has been troubling me and prayed to be shown any ways that could at least lead me to find my inner peace.

Initially nothing much happened coz i was still feeling the same, confusion was still there and everything was still same old same old.

Somewhere around midway which i hadn't realized when it happened i noticed something is changing in me. I am gradually beginning to feel at ease, lighter and began to see things in different angle :)

When i woke up this morning, i feel somewhat weird and i pondered. What could have possibly changed in me without me noticing?

Not long after that, i just sat on my bed and chuckled playfully.

He made me feel happier and a whole lot better about myself though i know it is just for temporary :)

He didn't show me any direct signs or symbols. He sent me an Angel instead.

*laughs hysterically*

Uiii okaylah. I am soo gonna stick with this malaikat fever til' at least end of April.

Speaking of April, hey Ms. Corn just...be prepared okay. LOL.

Have great days ahead people!

.xx.

Random.VERY.

Yesterday was a hot day.

Today's hot too.

I dislike 'hot' UNLESS it involves:

• Food. Come on~ certain food are better served piping hot. Like McD's apple pie. Damn.

• Guys. Cure for sore eyes. Just admit it ladies.

• Chix. Again, to admire their assets. wow.

But one thing i like especially when it comes about "hot".

TABASCO.

Wooww. I Loike.

p.s: Okay okay. This post is very nonsense-like. Sorry. No interesting material yet.

Cheers~

ALTERATION:

I never thought Angel could be hot too. So yeah, Ms. Sapphire, i heartheartheart Angel too. Thx for pointing that out. How can i forget about that??

Gagagagagaga.

.xx.

Weird Enough.

...i feel rather connected to this song.



Communication
By: The Cardigans

For 27 years I’ve been trying to believe and confide in
Different people I’ve found.
Some of them got closer than others
Some wouldn’t even bother and then you came around
I didn’t really know what to call you, you didn’t know me at all
But I was happy to explain.
I never really knew how to move you
So I tried to intrude through the little holes in your veins

And I saw you
But that’s not an invitation
That’s all I get
If this is communication
I disconnect
I’ve seen you, I know you
But I don’t know
How to connect, so I disconnect

You always seem to know where to find me and I’m still here behind you
In the corner of your eye.
I’ll never really learn how the love you
But I know that I love you through the hole in the sky.

Where I see you
And that’s not an invitation
That’s all I get
If this is communication
I disconnect
I’ve seen you, I know you
But I don’t know
How to connect, so I disconnect

Well this is an invitation
It’s not a threat
If you want communication
That’s what you get
I’m talking and talking
But I don’t know
How to connect
And I hold a record for being patient
With your kind of hesitation

I need you, you want me
But I don't know
How to connect
So I disconnect, I disconnect.

p.s: Hope you guys enjoyed it as much as i did! :)

.xx.

Two Parts.

PART 1

Pardon me for my previous post.

About a month ago, i had a long chat with Aunt Irine. She looked for mumi but mum wasn't home when she called. So the both of us chatted away instead.

Banyaklaa kami cerita. Pelbagai topic, berkaitan mahupun tidak. LOL. Anyhoots, aunty mentioned that she had mailed us a package right before Christmas i guess. But the mailed got lost somewhere in Asia, according to the U.S postage service. So there was nothing they can do.

The package never made it to us. I am pretty sure it has something to do with the customs. Well, we did experienced almost similar incident previously. The package was ripped open (without any of our presence!) and some stuff gone missing.

Yes. WTF kan? Screw you. Whoever you are.

Anyways, as we carry on with our conversation, aunty did mention that inside the 'lost' package were girls' items such as outfits, undergarments LOL!, makeups and a fragrance for mumi.

Sakit hati memang sakit hati la dengar but the moment aunty mentioned that the makeup sets and fragrance were of VICTORIA SECRET, i think i went a bit ballistic with all the cursing and swearing on the phone. Aunty just laughed haha.

The oh-so-optimistic aunt of mine decided to give it another shot. She mailed another parcel to us. This time, it arrived safely. Yay! But of course its contents were different already laa. But it's okay :)


(The parcel, me as the recipient *chuckles*)

Thanx aunty. Nanti kamurang balik sini end of the year bawa lagi banyak stuff k? MUHAHAHAHA.

*********************************************
PART 2

Last night was a bit hard for me. I was confused, mad at myself, just...emotionally unstable.

Therefore, i went out with Kajun, got Ila a cute lil' cake to celebrate her belated birthday at her crib.

We arrived, Ila was given a sort of suprise mini party. She went out from her room, partially blindfolded by Kak Nibung. Opened her eyes, got shocked, smiled and tears streamed on both cheeks.

Aaawwwwww..kami pun sayang Ila :) *hugss*

Later, we helped Ila and Kak Nibung to prepare the Bunga Telur for Ila's big day today. I had so much fun doing it as it was my first time hehe. And si Kajun seperti biasa, was being hillarious with her gelagat mau pilih2 telur yang kecil coz she complained that the net which hold the eggs together with the bunga are too small. LOL.

Had karaoke session for a bit and supper soon after that.

Around 1am Ila and Kak Nibung told me that Ila is ready for the henna drawing on the back of her palms. I was nervous. VERY nervous coz i had nil experience on henna drawing. Tapi si aunty Ila yakin juga mah saya. Kamikaze ko ni aunty! Haha.

I decided to just go on with it, coz i've made a promise to Ila that i'll do it and i did. And the outcome? Hmmmm..it wasn't really that nice but i guess it was A-Okay for a first timer *laughs*.

It looked something like this.


(Still half way done upon snapped.)

I guess i had fun doing it. At least it made me forget the craps i had on my mind earlier for a moment :)

Alritey! Tonight will be going to her crib again. This time, it's those feet! hehe.

p.s: SELAMAT PENGANTIN BARU to both NUR SHEILA MARIE GILBERT & ZAINUDDIN MASAODI.
Spelling may vary. My bad =p

.xx.

Bitch Me.

Have i ever mention that i HATE (note the usage of hate instead of dislike) gettin' drunk?

Gettin' tipsy is cool but not drunk.

It's fun alright but i still cannot accept the fact that i'll behave in a manner which is so not pleasant.

I really need to get this off my chest cos it is truly bothering me. It's disturbing.

Oh and did i ever mention that i HATE gettin waaaaaaayy high on booze and at the same time i have to drive home. Pfffttt~ Jenjeres tu geng. lol.

All i'm trying to say is, i HATE gettin' drunk, having no recollection of what had happened and having an extremely terrible headache the next day.

One more thing, i HATE gettin' drunk because i know i am not being myself especially on how i behave.

Truly like a bitch. Yes, bitch.

One more thing, i HATE gettin' drunk cos that's when i can't seem to think rationally and gettin' so emotional.

Lastly, i HATE gettin' wasted and jelous at the same time when i really shouldn't be.

I just loathe myself each time i got drunk.

yours truly,
the bitch.

.xx.

Beta Faham.

Lately i've been sappy and happy altogether. But i guess i'm feeling the latter more :)

One thing, i show less of my emotions though they're eating me from inside. I don't like the fact that i'd breakdown infront of other(s). I dislike that.

Bukan mau cakap ego bah tu, but it's more in terms of preference.

I made a promise to a friend not to write any related shytes anymore, but i also said that, here (blog) is the only place i prefer blurting things out. Whether or not people gonna read about it, that's a whole different story.

Anyhoots, for the umphteenth times, i totally understand the things we've discussed during one of our usual hangouts. I am very much glad we had that conversation.

Another thing, please leave that bad/guilt/sympathy feeling behind. Save it for other(s) who might need it more. Like i've said, i might say/act on impulse and can be awfully wrong at times but i have my own limits. I know when and where to make serious decision.

Trust me, i understood and still do.

I also know this, you love me and hate seeing me gettin' hurt kaaaaaan? *chuckles* Well well, if that's so, stop being so dramatic. I am going to be just alright bebeh! :)

Jadi, boleh kah kita semua kembali being goofy and just ignore everything? Adeh.

p.s: Try not to think soooo much. You'll only get yourself tangled in more unnecessary heartaches and dilemmas. It's never been easy to please everyone. Remember that.

p.p.s: I honestly and sincerely felt awful knowing that the whole thing still bothers you. Time is all needed. Now chill!!

p.p.p.s: To the rest of the readers if any, i highly recommend Slumdog Millionaire and Changeling. I like Slumdog cos it has a unique plot, depicting real-life in India while i love Changeling simply because it's an autobio movie and the fact that Angejolie is starring in it. Weeee~.

.xx.

1 Week.

A lot has been said & done. Yet never really reached for an absolute decision.

For a moment there, I thought we had. But i guessed we hadn't.

I dislike sympathies, either by giving or receiving of course depends on situation laa.

Therefore, i don't need you to tell me when to move on and SYMPATHIZE me by saying what you've said. Not from you, especially not from you.

I'm sure you meant well though and you know i loved you for that! lol. Thank you :)

While i was cruising the other night, eyes fixated on the road, while i kept quiet most of the time and laughed little at your jokes/stories unlike i always do, my mind was actually too preoccupied with stuff.

Somehow, just by the mere presence of you i felt comfort, almost content. Although ironically, you're the caused of my thinking alot.

However lately, i sense that you've been happy. Happier than usual. I guessed i know why and trust me if i tell you, i am happy for you.

I am sincerely happy for you, teman :)

I know i hesitated to "help" you initially, but now i take it back. I am more than glad to give you a hand. Just ask, i'll do it itupun mau depends laa. lol.

Anyhoots, i wish you again goodluck and a very happy ending in the end. It's about time you have one! hehehe.

p.s: If only you were sound enough w/o the effect of booze that night, i would probably jump into that idea of '1 week' coz i really liked that. I can pretty much tell we can click although akan berdebate in almost all topics!. And if we really do, that is what terrify me the most.

To the parrot who annoys me most.

.xx.